I don’t “do” resolutions.
I can’t even remember a time that I actually tried to make a new year’s resolution. But that doesn’t mean that I haven’t done things to better myself over the years. I suppose I always have ideas and goals—both short-term and long-term—in the back of my mind, and depending on what it is, I will take a step closer to it whenever I can, chipping away at it, or I will think it through over time and finally make the leap when I’m ready. I don’t need a new year to motivate me to do something.
When I look back on 2014, there are a few things that stand out to me—things that I did for myself last year—that were really GOOD. Positive changes, sound decisions. I’m not exaggerating when I say that they are things that changed my life.
Perhaps the biggest was my job change. I started setting that plan into motion at the tail end of 2013, and I worked pretty hard at it until all of the pieces eventually fell into place in March. There were events that occurred at my old job that made it so that I didn’t want to work there anymore, and in a lot of ways, that was really sad for me. I had a good thing going there for quite some time, and then it turned kind of sour. A few months after I left, things improved there again, so it begs the question—should I have stuck it out? Would I have been happy there again?
The thing is: I have no regrets. The path of my career has always been pretty well defined. I have never had to make any excruciatingly difficult decisions, because doors always seem to open for me when they are supposed to. In this aspect of my life, I think that things really do happen for a reason, and as a result, I’m exactly where I’m supposed to be. I’m working with great people—not that I wasn’t before—and I have more flexibility for my family. I’m growing as a professional. I’m being given valuable opportunities. I’m doing good work, and I like that work. It makes me happy.
On a more personal level, the best thing that I did for myself this year was to start CrossFit. I’ve been going consistently, three times per week, for five months now. I get up in the morning and I go. I don’t ever dread it. I don’t ever consider skipping it (in fact, I feel HORRIBLE guilt if I do miss it, even if for a good reason!). Sure, it’s torture sometimes and there are times that I’m suffering through the workout—and I sure do suffer afterward, sometimes for days afterward—but I finally found something that I love. Or I’m just a masochist and have a strange addiction, but whatever. It’s working for me.
Let me digress for a second… Nora comes to CrossFit with me sometimes, before preschool, and she’ll sit and tinker on the iPad while I work out. For the longest time, I thought she was just playing with her games and learning apps but then I started to discover surprise photos in my Photostream (like the one above!). She takes stealth photos of me (and others) at the gym, which is just hysterical—especially when they are halfway decent and not just a huge blur. And even more so when they have cool filters on them. She cracks me up. Once, she even came home from school with a picture she had drawn, which she later explained to us, “It’s a picture of Mommy lifting weights at the gym.”
So clearly it’s made an impression on her. I love that. It sort of makes me more proud than anything else.
Anyway, I can do things now that I never thought I could do. I have conquered a rope climb—something I couldn’t even do in gym class in elementary school. (But I do need a LOT more practice to do it consistently.) I can also do hand stands now, a skill that eluded me until last week. I just couldn’t do it, and it was mostly a mental thing. I was always afraid I was going to drop myself on my head. But I kept trying and five months later, I got it. These are really small things—I’m still nowhere near a CrossFit “star,” in fact I still feel like a fraud half the time! But they are goals that I’ve accomplished, in addition to just getting off of my ass.
In the short term, another thing I plan to do relative to CrossFit is a nutrition challenge with my gym. It’s something else that I pretty much swore I would never do—after all, one of the primary reasons I work out is SO THAT I CAN EAT. But that’s the thing about CrossFit, I guess, is that you always kind of want to push yourself further and further. CrossFit has changed my body, but not as drastically as I would’ve hoped (at least not yet). And I’ve actually GAINED a few pounds since starting (even though my clothes still fit fine and everything). I’m curious what will happen if I combine the exercise with a modified diet. So we’ll see. That starts January 19 and it goes for five weeks. I’ll probably be posting about it again at some point because I’ll need to chronicle it one way or another so that I’ll remember that a) I CAN survive it, or b) I should never do that again. :)
Lastly, I discovered essential oils last spring. It has been a fun journey, an exploration of the ways I can modify our daily lives to cut out a bunch of chemical and artificial crap and replace them with essential oils. I’m not saying we’re living perfect, natural lives—not at all—but this was a change that was relatively easy to make, one that I could start small with, and then build up more over time. I now make a lot of our own household cleaners and personal care products like bug spray and hand sanitizer. I use them to help with itching, headaches, skin care, sore muscles (of which I’ve had MANY), canker sores, pimples, bug bites, congestion, and the list goes on and on. I diffuse pretty much constantly, now at home AND at work… and even in my car. To help with relaxation, mood lifting, easing anxiety, you name it.
Using essential oils has been eye opening. Definitely helpful. And really, really fun. Over the last nine months, it has become more than a “lifestyle change,” it’s become a hobby. I love them and I want others to love them, too. I always want to share them with anyone who will humor me and listen! I’ve helped friends, family, and strangers with various things, too, all through essential oils. That’s been rewarding in and of itself.
On that note, shameless plug since it’s so relevant to all of this… I’m co-hosting another introduction to essential oils webinar this weekend—Sunday, January 11 at 9:00 p.m. ET / 8:00 p.m. CT / 7:00 p.m. MT / 6:00 p.m. PT. There is a fantastic promotion going on right now, too, for anyone who has ever considered getting started with essential oils. It’s literally the most generous promotion doTERRA offers all year. I’m also placing my own monthly order this weekend, and am always happy to add items to my own order for others to try—and extend my discount (25% off) to you, too.
For an invitation to the webinar or information about oils, to ask questions or whatever, feel free to email me at heatherdriveblog at yahoo dot com.
Of course, my family and our health remain my greatest blessings. I hope that goes without saying. I cherish our time together as best I can. I try to be conscious of it, knowing that time is fleeting and our kids are only going to be small for a short period of time. I’m conscious of it, but try not to dwell on it, because oh.my.god it’s so sad to think about sometimes.
A year is long, but all too short as well. I’m still (mostly) the same person I’ve always been. But I’m also in a very different place in my life than I was 12 months ago, even if I didn’t make the most drastic changes ever. A new job is pretty big, but the other things… they are just a couple of the many decisions I made over the course of 2014 that became pieces of the puzzle of my life. Who knows where they will lead me long term, or what it will look like at the end of 2015.
It’s interesting to think about.
It’ll be fun to find out.
Happy New Year!
So many blog posts to catch up on, and so little time. But I figured that I could at least kick off 2015 by posting a couple of the recipes that I actually got around to taking photos of during the holidays.
We had plans to get together with my grandma and aunt the weekend before Christmas. My mom was making us a nice dinner, and she asked if I could bring a dessert. I wanted something festive and fun, but also needed something easy—my to-do list was long at this point, and there just weren’t enough hours in the day. Red velvet is Christmasy… but a cake was not in the cards. But cookies? I could handle these.
They turned out a little less chewy than I would’ve liked—they were pretty firm—but I think I may have overbaked them a little. It’s tough to gauge “browning” on a bright red cookie! :) Next time, I will take them out of the oven a couple of minutes earlier. Also, my first batch of cookies that came out of the oven was kind of rough looking, with “sharp,” jagged tops on them (you can see a few of those over to the right and bottom of the platter in the pic). For the subsequent batches, I used the palm of my hand to flatten out the cookie slightly before baking, and that helped make them prettier. All in all, a good cookie—and unique!
Red Velvet White Chocolate Chip Cookies
(Source: The Nifty Foodie)
Ingredients:
– 1 1/2 cups all-purpose flour
– 2 1/2 tbsp. cocoa powder
– 1 tsp. cornstarch
– 3/4 tsp. baking powder
– 1/4 tsp. salt
– 1/2 cup butter, softened
– 1 cup granulated sugar
– 1 tsp. distilled white vinegar
– 1 large egg
– 1 1/2 tsp. vanilla extract
– 1 1/2 tsp. red food coloring
– 3/4 cup white chocolate chips
Directions:
1. Preheat the oven to 375 degrees. Line two cookie sheets with parchment paper or a silicone mat and set aside.
2. In a medium sized mixing bowl, whisk together the flour, cocoa powder, cornstarch, baking powder and salt. Set this aside.
3. Using a stand mixer, mix together the butter, sugar and vinegar for 3-4 minutes, until light and fluffy. Mix in the egg and scrape down the bowl. Add the vanilla extract and food coloring and mix until just blended.
4. With the mixer on low, add in the dry ingredients and mix until everything is just combined. Using a spatula, mix in the white chocolate chips.
5. Using a medium sized cookie scoop, scoop the dough out onto the prepared cookie sheets, leaving about 2 inches between each cookie for baking. Bake the cookies for 9-11 minutes, and allow them to cool on the cookie sheet for 10 minutes. Then, transfer the cookies to a cooling rack to finish cooling.
We had a wonderful Christmas, and I hope all of you who celebrate did as well. Every year is great, of course, but with both of the girls a little bit older this year, it seemed to be even more special than before.
The lead-up to Christmas was just as busy as the holiday itself. We celebrated with Michael’s older sister and her family on the Saturday prior, then also celebrated with my grandma and aunt on that Sunday.
Tuesday night, we got the kids dressed in their pajamas and packed some cookies and took a drive to see Christmas lights.
And then Wednesday was Christmas Eve, which began the whirlwind of “official” events. Nora helped me do a good bit of wrapping in the morning, Vivienne napped, and then we got ready to go to 2:00 p.m. Mass. I had to do the matching dresses again this year, although this time I went with something a little bit less formal, more comfortable, something they’re more likely to wear again this winter.
Note how Vivienne had to have a necklace, too. :)
After church, we went to Michael’s parents’ house to spend some time with them, open gifts with them, etc. It was nice and low-key. They invited my mom to join us (we all went to church together), so that was nice, too.
The girls checking out the nativity set. So cute.
SOOOO excited about her new Frozen ear muffs.
Vivienne was only semi-into opening gifts this year. She’s had fun with the new toys, but the opening? Meh. I expect the excitement level to go up a few notches by next Christmas. :)
We headed home around the girls’ bedtime so we could do the “getting ready for Santa routine.” First, Nora made some reindeer food (oatmeal and sprinkles) and we went outside to sprinkle it in our yard. Also? It was super warm on Christmas Eve. I think the temperature got up into the 50s that day! Crazy, and way different than last year, when we had a decent amount of snow on the ground.
I love this pic, just because I think it captures the excitement and magic of the anticipation of Santa. Christmas Eve is such a fun night!
We went inside and got them into their jammies and got everything ready for Santa inside. Nora wrote him a note that she came up with all by herself (“Dear Santa, We are going to miss Sprinkles [our elf] so much. I hope you brought us nice presents. Love, Nora”). I wrote it out for her and then she copied it all in her own crazy handwriting.
We put out cookies, milk, and baby carrots (nine, so each of the reindeer could have one). Then the girls had to sample the Santa cookies themselves (naturally).
It was at least 8:30 by the time we got them into bed (pretty late for them!) and I was starting to panic. So much to do! I started wrapping and preparing right away and was up until 1:00 a.m. I always tell myself I’m not going to save it all for Christmas Eve but OHMYGOD this was the worst. Seriously NEED to start in advance next year. Finally, it was time for bed.
We weren’t up crazy early. In fact, the girls slept in reasonably well. My dad arrived on Christmas Eve but was so tired from his road trip that we hadn’t seen much of him yet… and we had our own little Christmas morning with just the four of us before he even woke up!
Nora was so excited. She walked into the family room, saw her new purple bike, and immediately said, “A BIKE! Just what I always wanted!” (Even though, in reality, she wanted a Frozen character bike.) This was a theme for the rest of our Christmas… “just what I always wanted!” She was so grateful for everything, and didn’t complain or even mention the things she did NOT get (her list had a ton of stuff on it). I was so proud of her. Don’t get me wrong, she still REALLY loves the gift part of Christmas, and it’s still what it’s really all about for her. But she truly enjoyed and was thankful for everything she received, which makes it all the more enjoyable as her gift givers.
I felt like we did really well with picking and choosing from her list, and coming up with a few things on our own as well. She has loved and played with everything a lot. Christmas WIN!
After we had finished opening everything and had a little bit of time to play, we packed up and headed to my mom’s for Christmas breakfast and more presents… in our pajamas (our tradition). My dad had since woken up and came with us (a new tradition for him to be here for Christmas morning… also so nice for him to be included).
We had our big breakfast, then settled in for more presents with everyone. We let the kids play afterward for a good while and then we packed everything up and headed home. Vivienne went down for a nap and we decided to take advantage of the relatively mild weather to take Nora out on her new bike!
She initially panicked at how “wobbly” it was but after adjusting/lowering the training wheels all of the way down to the ground and making it sturdy, she was LOVING it. It’s her first real bike and we were so proud of how well she did with it! We ended up taking her out on it the following couple of days, too. So much outdoor time in the days surrounding Christmas… so weird. Not necessarily good, not necessarily bad… just different. I can’t say I hated it, although I do have a big appreciation for a white Christmas, too.
We hosted Christmas dinner (spaghetti and meatballs and sausage), as usual, with both sets of parents and any siblings who wanted to/were able to join. This year it was the parents as well as Tyler, Marie, and Cristina. We just mostly relaxed and enjoyed each other’s company.
Nora entertained all of us with her new magic tricks (bought this for her on a whim, since she’s been pretending to cast “spells” lately… and this was such a huge gift win!).
I’m just so thankful for everything. My family, our health, our home, and our ability to give to each other. It’s not all about the presents, of course, but they sure were a source of happiness for many. That’s fun.
I hope all of you had wonderful holidays, no matter what you celebrate. It’s amazing that we’re getting ready to say goodbye to another year tonight. Bring on 2015!
You guys, CHRISTMAS IS COMING. I have lists coming out of my ears. Some of them are not even written down, they’re just in my head, because seriously, who has time to even make the lists?!
MY LIFE IS CRAZY. I am loving all of it, but IT IS CRAZY.
This space is so neglected that I’ve almost wondered if it’s worth coming back to at this point. Does anyone care? Do I care? Will I EVER get back into the swing of regular posting? Is it better to post just a handful of times a month, or does that just look like a pathetic effort? These are the questions that circle around in my head lately. But honestly, I haven’t even had that much time to worry about it.
We got back from Florida. Thanksgiving happened. Then Christmas season came rushing in and I feel like I’ve had no time to even breathe.
Work.
Preschool.
CrossFit.
Holiday activities.
Dinners with family and friends.
Parties.
Cleaning.
Tons of online shopping.
Plus, I did two family photo shoots for friends before we went to Disney, so I spent a lot of my free time within the past several weeks editing those photos and getting that all squared away. Now, I feel like I’ve been spending every free moment buttoning up last-minute Christmas shopping because OH MY GOSH IT SNUCK UP ON ME. (And I know “snuck” is supposed to be “sneaked” but I can’t get behind that English. Sorry, grammar gods.)
So let’s catch up quickly on the highlights of the first half of December, shall we?
We went Christmas tree hunting on the day after Thanksgiving, per our tradition.
It was really freaking cold, but still pretty enjoyable. The kids were good and we found a pretty tree… even if it ended up being bigger (wider) than expected when we got it into the house. Oops. By now, it has grown on me and I don’t mind the fact that it’s taking up more space than I anticipated.
I love sitting here in the living room with it all lit up, diffusing my festive essential oils in the evenings. If I’m going to be up until 11:30 every night online shopping and stuff, at least I get to do it in a relaxing environment.
We got the tree into the house and the lights strung on it while the girls both napped. We woke up Nora after a good snooze (we almost always wake her up from any naps she takes, since if she sleeps too long, she’s up way too late), and let her help us with all of the ornaments. Vivienne eventually woke up and we brought her down to take a look. She was fascinated and did a lot of touching at first, but she is actually WAY better with the tree than I expected her to be. The novelty has worn off a bit, I guess, because she rarely fusses with it now. She’s generally into EVERYTHING these days so we were expecting the tree to be a source of great amusement for her, but nope. Thank goodness.
A couple of weekends ago, we had our monthly dinner with a group of our friends. Afterward, we went to a parade of lights in the nearby village. All of the local fire departments decorate the trucks with lights and the kids get a pretty big kick out of it. Nora enjoyed herself immensely, most because of the hot cocoa we brought with us for her to drink (girl LOVES her hot cocoa).
The next day, we sat down with Nora to work on an actual Christmas list for Santa, written by her. It turned out so cute. She’s getting so much better at writing her letters… even though I know most of you probably can’t read half of this (below). Haha! She kept telling me the things she wanted, and instead of spelling them all PAINSTAKINGLY out loud for her to write down, I wrote them down myself and let her copy it onto her own list. She was excited about the list, but not so excited about posing for my pictures.
Then it was off to brave the mall to see Santa. Nora was nervous about it before we even left the house but she was a pretty good trooper. Absolutely refused to even attempt to sit on his lap, and we didn’t push the issue at all. Vivienne handled the characters at Disney pretty well, so we thought maybe she’d be friendly with Santa, but…
…NO. I guess Santa is still too creepy for most toddlers! :) As soon as we got close to him and motioned like we were going to put her down on his lap, she FREAKED OUT and would not stop crying, even with Michael holding her. Oops. Poor kid. Just another year of scaring the crap out of our children for the sake of posterity, I suppose. Fingers crossed for next year.
Nora did enjoy putting her letter into the mailbox for Santa. I was a little sad she noticed the mailbox, as I kind of wanted to keep the letter as a keepsake, all cute with her little handwriting. But at least I did get pictures of it!
Afterward, we ventured over to Build-A-Bear for our first ever experience there. Nora got a gift card for her birthday in September and we almost never go to the mall (HATE!) so this was a good opportunity to kill two birds with one stone.
Of course, Nora LOVED it (what kid wouldn’t?) and wanted to spend approximately $1 million on accessories for her new Clarice reindeer (whom she renamed “Jingle” at the birth certificate station).
We managed to get out of there without paying for any extras except for a dress, so I think that was “winning” for us, at least at Build-A-Bear. Whoever came up with that concept is a FREAKING GENIUS. And very rich, I’m sure.
When we got home that day, we realized that Vivienne had a fever, and it turned out to be a pretty relentless one that wasn’t responding to meds. She acted pretty normal despite it on Sunday, but needless to say, when she woke up Monday morning and STILL had that pesky fever, she won herself a day home. By that point, she wasn’t eating anything and was acting a bit clingy and rundown. I enjoyed the extra snuggles immensely. While I was soaking it up, she was sitting quietly with me on the couch. Suddenly, she felt a bit heavier in my arms and I looked down to find she had completely passed out. SO SWEET.
I put her up in her crib and she proceeded to take a FOUR AND A HALF HOUR NAP, y’all. That’s pretty impressive, I think. I can’t remember Nora ever sleeping THAT long, even when sick. I thought there was no way she’d ever sleep at night, but sure enough, come 7:30, she was passed out again and slept all the way through until morning. We ended up sending her back to Mary’s after another morning lingering at home, and she was fine. No other symptoms ever surfaced besides that fever and the major decrease in appetite.
On Wednesday, we had a sizable snow storm. I think we amassed about 18 inches of snow over the course of 48 hours. It snowed non-stop all day Wednesday so I worked from home.
Then, Nora woke up on Thursday morning burning up with a 103-degree fever herself. *sigh* ANOTHER day at home that week, and we kept her home on Friday, too. She, too, never ended up with any other real symptoms, so it must’ve been the same bug. Our friend’s son (whom we were with for the parade of lights the weekend before) was diagnosed with the flu that same week, but I feel like it would’ve lasted more than two days if that’s what they had? I don’t know. But I swear, this (current) week has been amazing just because it has been NORMAL!
Anyway, that’s the last few weeks in a nutshell. We’ve got a lot more to squish in the next six days before Christmas. SIX DAYS. Eeeek! I am not even quite done shopping yet, and have not done a lick of wrapping. Somehow, I usually end up waiting until Christmas Eve and then it’s a huge wrapping marathon instead of the relaxing Christmas Eve by the fire that I always have pictured in my head.
If you celebrate Christmas, where are you at with the whole process? Completely finished (I kind of hate you)? Almost there? Tons left to do?
We are hosting dinner at our house on Christmas Day (as usual), so we have that to plan for, too. This homestretch is always kind of stressful, but I love it so much, too. Happy Holidays, everyone!
My 4 year old is afraid of everything right now. EVERYTHING.
I’ve been spending a lot of time thinking about this since our trip to Disney World. It was during our trip a few weeks ago when Nora’s fears really seemed to take hold and become more of a challenge… not just for her, but for all of us. That first day in Magic Kingdom, it became glaringly apparent to Michael and me that we overestimated what Nora would be willing to do. We thought she would ride more rides. See more shows. Visit more characters and see more attractions. But she took one look at Splash Mountain and proclaimed it “too scary,” and then the rest of our day kind of went downhill from there.
Amazingly, she rode Big Thunder Mountain Railroad with me after just qualifying for the height requirement. I told her it was a rollercoaster, and I watched carefully as other smaller children returned from their round, seemingly unscathed. I figured we’d give it a go. Nora HATED it. She started panicking as soon as we went into the dark and the loud CLACK CLACK CLACK CLACK of the chains pulling the car up the hill began, and she proceeded to scream and sob throughout the rest of the ride, repeatedly telling me she didn’t like it and wanted to get off. I felt terrible. I promised I wouldn’t take her on anymore rides like that for the rest of the trip.
But the thing is, it didn’t end there. She refused to ride Peter Pan because she was sure she would see Captain Hook. She wouldn’t ride Ariel because she was terrified she’d see Ursula. For a while, I thought maybe it was Big Thunder Mountain Railroad that did her in. I thought that was my mistake, and what had caused this downward spiral. But then I think about how she was right out of the gate… the whole thing with Splash Mountain. She was scared from the get-go. I certainly don’t think Big Thunder Mountain Railroad HELPED matters, but I think we were going to be dealing with fears regardless.
Then there were characters. Nora loved the princesses and had no problems with them. Then, on our second morning in Disney World, we went to Tusker House in Animal Kingdom for breakfast. It’s a character meet-and-greet with Mickey, Donald, Daisy, Goofy. The first to our table was Donald, and Nora got up and interacted with him, posed for a photo by herself, had him sign her book. But then, at the very end, Donald “kissed” her and it was over. After that, she whined incessantly about how she was afraid of all of the other characters, didn’t want to meet them, didn’t want to take photos with them, etc. It was like a switch had been flipped and we were dealing with a different kid. It didn’t just last the rest of the breakfast, or the rest of the day, it lasted the rest of the trip. She acted the same exact way when we went to Chef Mickey’s for breakfast (another character meal) a couple of days later.
Michael and I really had to let go of a lot of expectations we had about Disney World to accommodate her fears. After a day or two of dealing with them, I felt like I had a pretty good handle on when to push her to overcome the fears (walking into Ariel’s Grotto for a meet and greet, for instance) and when to ease up and not push the issue. We forced ourselves to follow her lead more, and let her make the most of the trip for herself. Fighting her every step of the way wasn’t fun for any of us—which we learned with dramatic flair on Day 1—so Michael and I soon realized that we had to let her do Disney World her way. If she wanted to ride the same rides over and over again, fine. If she wanted to spend half an hour playing instruments in Africa at Animal Kingdom or Epcot, fine. It was in her joy that I found my joy, so it was better for all of us this way. (And that, my friends, is my first Disney takeaway, for all of you planning future trips. If you have expectations? LET IT GO, just like Elsa says.)
Anyway, we’ve been back home about 10 days now and things have not changed. Nora is still afraid of everything now that we’re at home. Movies that she’s seen before. The dark that she’s slept in all of her life. Santa Claus and his reindeer. She complains of her tummy hurting every night at bedtime.
All of these things are not entirely new. She’s always been a “cautious” kid. An observer. Shy. We’ve dealt with the movie thing before—sometimes she’ll love something for a while (take Finding Nemo, for instance) but then suddenly label it “too scary.” She has always been wary of Cinderella because of the mean cat, the mean stepmother and stepsisters, etc. She has never really liked Lion King because of Scar and the hyenas. But for a really recent example, let’s talk about The Grinch That Stole Christmas. Not the creepy Jim Carrey version, but the classic cartoon. Nora watched this with me on a whim last Christmas season when it happened to be on one afternoon when I brought her downstairs from her nap. At the time, I was surprised at how much she was into it. Afterward, she talked about it a lot, about how the Grinch is mean and takes everyone’s presents, but how he is nice in the end. And, because she has a memory of an elephant, Nora started talking about the Grinch again several weeks ago. She started talking about the movie, but also the book—which she remembered we had in our collection, when I DIDN’T EVEN KNOW WE HAD IT. We read the book a few times in November (not following my rule to respect the turkey!), and she was excited to watch the movie, which we said we’d do in a few weeks. Well, last night at dinner, I mentioned how the Grinch was going to be on TV this week and how we would record it and OH MY GOD, wouldn’t you know it? Now the movie is too scary. She went on and on and ON about how it’s too scary and blah blah blah, even after I was like OKAY NEVERMIND I DON’T EVEN CARE IF YOU DON’T WATCH IT.
The bedtime thing is kind of frustrating, but again, we’ve gone through stages of this. Perhaps not quite to this extreme—she’s REALLY insistent on the hall light being left on right now, and does a lot of whining right before I leave the room—but we’ve dealt with it in one way or another in the past. Several months ago, she suddenly decided she couldn’t sleep with the door closed anymore, so we now leave it open a crack. Now she says she can’t deal with the dark, so we leave the hall light on until she falls asleep. These all seem like fairly reasonable requests for a four year old—I remember wanting the door open and the hall light on, even as an older child—so I don’t argue it much. But when lumped in with everything else… it’s been tougher to deal with than before.
I feel like this has to be developmentally normal. I’ve done a bit of Googling, and it seems that way. I’ve definitely noticed lately a difference in her imagination, and it makes sense to me that a more sophisticated imagination could result in a spike in the number of fears. But my biggest issue right now is that I don’t know what to do. I’m not sure how to handle all of this. Do we ignore it and stick with the “and this too shall pass” parenting philosophy? Or are there specific things we should be doing to help her along and make sure we’re not scarring her for life? And then there is part of me that wonders, of course, if maybe this ISN’T entirely normal. Does she have anxiety?
This is one of those times when I REALLY wish that children came with a handbook.
With this new level of fear has also come a whole new level of attitude. The amount of sass emanating from this child lately has been a little unbelievable at times. So maybe we’re just dealing with “4” as a whole right now? I’ve heard repeatedly how challenging an age this can be, and maybe she’s starting to show us why.
I’ve been consciously stepping up my game with the positive reinforcement. Overall, I still maintain that she is a really good kid that just has her MOMENTS. I’ve been telling her how proud I am when she’s behaved well, or when she’s brave. I tell her a lot about how much I love her, and how I think she’s such a good big sister, etc. She is still the sweetest, funniest, loveliest little girl I’ve ever known, and I seriously couldn’t love her more. But she’s also making me want to pull out my own hair. (But not really, since it’s all just starting to fill in again after the post-partum hair loss catastrophe of 2013.)
Has anyone else been through this—or currently going through this—with a preschooler? What worked? What didn’t? Are any of you out there early childhood teachers or child development specialists that can shed any light on any of this for us?
I’ve actually been thinking about putting in a call to our pediatrician because she LOVES dealing with the behavior challenges. (Note to self: CALL HER. I’d love to hear what she has to say.)
About
I'm Heather. I'm 33 and have been married to Michael for seven years. Together, we have two beautiful little girls we love more than anything, and a miniature dachshund who drives us crazy. I'm a full-time working mom who has very little time for my own "stuff" these days, like home improvement, cooking/baking, cake decorating, and photography. Despite the team not making the playoffs since 1999, I'm STILL a Buffalo Bills fan, which I think speaks to my loyalty AND sense of humor. I can't wait to pick up the pace with travel again some day... you know, when we're done being ruled by tiny fists. Welcome to my blog.
